LEARNING TO LISTEN
At Speaker Meetings; I like to sit on the front row, so I can focus on what the speaker has to say. To stay focused, I ask myself questions about what the speaker is saying; can I identify with what he or she is saying? What is the point he or she is tying to make? Is this speaker communicating that point of interest? What do I want to gain from this talk? I wrote a few ideas, or perhaps I should say IDEALS of what I like to hear when I go to an A.A. meeting and what I don’t.
In all honesty I can say I never attended an A.A. meeting that I didn’t get something useful out of. I could say there are two great teachings to learn from:
#1. The speaker has something or is doing something I want.
#2. The speaker has something or is doing something I do not want.
*I want something said that I could use.
*I want to enjoy the message and be informed.
*I want the fellowship found in meetings.
*I want to hear about the illness but ending in recovering to some degree.
*I want the message understandable and simple.
*I want to hear about the solutions -- steps, traditions, and service in a personal way.
*I want to hear about our Higher Power and how he or she became conscious of Him.
*I don't want intellectual or caned stuff -- mindless bumper stickers.
*I want to be able to identify with the message or the messenger -- at least some of it.
*I want some emotional pull.
*I want to hear what it was like -- personal stories of the disease with love and humor.
*I want to hear what happen -- personal stories about living the Program with love and humor.
*I want to hear what it is like now -- personal stories of how it is today consciously living, moving and having their being in our Program.
*I want the talk to be funny, sad but always ending with great hero stuff of our Program.
*I want the sharing to be lovingly, tastefully done in a realistic way.
*I want to remember that it is just fine when the speaker is fearful and making mistakes.
*I want every one to support the speaker.
*I want the speaker to make fun of their self, not others unless it is done very lovingly, thoughtful way.
*I want to hear how they found their Higher Power.
*I want to hear about our Higher Power -- how one became conscious of His Present and of His Attributes.
*I want to hear about forgiveness of others and their self.
*I want to be able to identify with the Higher Self within the speaker.
*I want hear how they first found the Program.
*I want every speaker to do well.
*I want every speaker to feel loved, honored and respected.
*I want the speaker to stay on one subject at a time.
*I want the speaker to have a beginning, middle and end.
*I want what is quoted out of the book to fit as a personal experience.
*I want the speaker to walk their talk.
*I want to hear good things about our Program and hero stories.
*I want the speaker to ask our Higher Power and all of us listening for our support and thank us afterward.
*I want to hear about total commitment.
*I want to hear about how great our AA books are and how useful they are giving examples.
*I want to hear about their sponsors and any other heroes of theirs.
*I don't like big shot or showing off -- I do love truly humble people but not pretenders.
*I do not expect any speaker to be perfect or professional.
*I don’t like to hear a speaker blame other people, places or things for their problems.
*I want to believe it is our Higher Power speaking through the speaker and Him hearing His message through us.
*I want the timeliest message shared, but we must trust only our Higher Power to know what that is.
*I want the speaker to know I am a loving listener.
*I want to ask our Father to use us all – I am to pray before the meeting starts, during the meeting and after the meeting is over.
*I want to give thank to the speaker for being a channel of our Father.
*I would like the speaker to practice these characteristics; Higher Purpose, focused, Preparedness, Conviction, Faith, Trust, Perseverance, Creativity, Risk taking, Curiosity, Resilience, Commitment, Courage, Love and Independence with Interdependence.
*I want to go to the speaker after the meeting and thank he or she for sharing.
QUESTIONS
What are your "wants to hear" on this list?
How about making your own "want to hear" list?